Review by Ida Vega-Landow

Oh boy, talk about Venus and Mars! This literary labor of love was written by a co-habiting couple in Hollywood, both writers of popular TV situation comedies, both divorced, both crazy about each other, but not so crazy about the little differences between men and women that keep popping up whenever they try to have a serious discussion.

You know, the way she keeps asking “Am I fat?” and getting mad whether he gives her an honest answer (which is insulting) or a flattering one (which is a lie, because people in love should be honest with each other). Or the way he tries to deal with her problems logically (telling her what she should have said or done), when all she really wants is for him to sympathize with her to prove he’s on her side. All the things that drive you crazy in a relationship, that make you swear the opposite sex is either from another planet or just evolved differently from your own sex.

I’ve been there, done that, gotten the tee shirts emblazoned with feminist slogans like “Men just don’t get it!” and “A Woman without a Man is like a Fish without a Bicycle”. I even acquired a man of my own, nine years ago on December 30th, who keeps moaning and groaning that I’m driving him crazy whenever we argue, and who seems too stupid to understand that I wouldn’t be driving him crazy if he hadn’t driven me crazy to begin with!

That’s what makes this book so much fun, yet so frustrating, because I get it, I really do. My problem is that I understand where both sides are coming from. I understand Jenny Lee’s gripes about her man because my man does so many of the same stupid things, as well as every other man I’ve ever met, yet I’m sure these same men will all swear with their hands on the Bible that I’m the crazy one.

I sympathize with Howard Morris because I’ve learned to control my emotions to the point where I can stand back and watch other women acting crazy, thinking “Stupid bitch! I would never say a thing like that in public to my husband.” But when these same women confide in me about the stupid things their men do, I find myself nodding sympathetically and agreeing with them that All Men Are Fools, and if it weren’t for us women, they wouldn’t be able to walk without tripping over their untied shoelaces.

This whole book is a study in “He Said, She Said”, where both sides give you their point of view and demand that you agree with them. And you either agree unconditionally with one of them, because you’re the same gender, or you disagree with both of them, because this kind of emotional upheaval is foreign to you–which means you’ve either never been in love, or your own relationship is so angst-free, O lucky man or woman!–and you don’t understand why these people, if they’re so in love with each other, just can’t get along. Or, you’re like me, able to see both sides of the coin, which makes it both funny and sad that two people in love can’t seem to understand each other.

Take flowers, for example. Jenny devotes a whole section of one chapter to flowers and how important they are to a woman as a token of her man’s affection. She even compares flowers to blowjobs in an effort to demonstrate to men how important they are, though she does replace the word “blowjobs” with the word “pizza” for the benefit of the squeamish, italicizing the word so we’ll know what she really means: “Men love pizza. Most men don’t feel they get as much pizza as they would like. Men would like to have pizza every day. I’m pretty sure if men got pizza every day there would be fewer wars and you could look out your window and see grown men skipping down the street and singing. As we women know, men rarely get pizza every day. In the beginning of a relationship men may get pizza a lot, and may even get pizza a few days in a row or even twice a day if they are lucky, but in general, I’m willing to climb out on a limb and wave to you from above and say that men don’t get pizza as often as they would like. Men in relationships want more pizza.”

You see, guys? We long for flowers the same way that you long for pizza! We both know that flowers and pizza are not essential for survival and are sometimes inconvenient and messy to give, but you still love getting them! As much as we women love to get flowers, unless we’re allergic, in which case we expect you to remember this little fact and shower us with some other lovely and colorful tokens of your affection, like candy or jewelry. And yes, I admit we women are guilty of expecting you to read our minds when it comes to love. Consider it a compliment that we love you so much we take it for granted that you are as sensitive as we are, so of course you would automatically know what we like.

But guys in love make a similar mistake, thinking that the women they love are so much more sensible than other women are. In other words, they expect us to think like men, be as logical, rational and hardheaded as they are. Sorry, guys, we’ve made many advances in the Women’s Liberation Movement, and we can do the businesslike thing when it comes to business. But when it comes to romance, or just plain day-to-day living under the same roof with someone of the opposite sex, we just can’t think like you. Howard laments about this in a section entitled “Why Can’t A Woman Be More Like A Man?” after the song that Rex Harrison sings in the musical “My Fair Lady”. Howard claims that what Rex was really asking was “Why can’t a woman be consistent like a man?” In other words, he expects a gender that is ruled by our emotions and our hormones (yes, even those of us undergoing menopause are affected by hormones, mostly artificial, but still hormones!) to behave in the same boring, logical manner day after day. Why should we? Not all problems are simple enough to be resolved in an emotionless manner; if they were, then there’d be no point in making movies like “Old Yeller”, because nobody would cry at the thought of shooting your faithful family dog after he gets rabies, because it is the logical thing to do when your dog gets an incurable illness that threatens the rest of the livestock, as well as your family.

But I digress, another thing that Howard complains about in my fair sex. We women are capable of jumping from one seemingly unrelated subject to another during a conversation, because all topics are related from our point of view, while men narrow-mindedly insist upon sticking to the original topic. How stupid is that? I’m sorry, Howard and Jenny, but you’re both right, and I refuse to get in between you two. Fight it out in the final draft of your book, since this is only a review copy and you both have plenty of time to change your minds. And don’t remind me that changing one’s mind has always been a woman’s prerogative: men have the right to change their minds too, especially once they’ve realized how stupid–oops, I mean misinformed they’ve been. So long, guys, and good luck storming the castle!

Free From Addiction: Facing yourself and Embracing Recovery

Review by Linda Yau

Addictions are something that inflicts one in five Americans, and this can lead to family heartbreaks and tragedies. In the context of Free From Addiction, addiction is a negative aspect that must be cured of. Addictions are usually caused by an emotional trauma, that an individual would try to escape from, either with the use of alcohol or drugs (either legal or illegal). I had a hard time reading through this book, it was an definitely a self-help book for those who can use this book, and are use to reading these type of books. The author of this book is a medical doctor that founded a clinic on the Western Coast to treat those that had addictions. He gathers enough facts and case studies of patients that was treated at the clinic to write this book.

Parts of the book cover defining what addictions is, what misconceptions there are, what are signs of addictions. Then there is a section considering how the brain is changed as the body gets use to the addiction side effects. That is why there is a mandatory detox period. Recovering from addictions is difficult, as there are easily relapse periods. But what can influence the individual is the environment they are in, and the attitudes of their families.

There are also chapters within the book that mention how soon is it or what risks are there to intervening on the treatment of the individual. As with the courses of action to try and treat addiction. Should the individual choose either therapy or medication? What risks are there for medication, and what medicine treatments are offered?

Now that I sufficiently explained the contents of this self-help book, what criticism can I say about this book? There weren’t any more recommended reading, so the basics of this book, was on the clinic and the doctor’s personal experience. Should this book be considered as an empirical and vanity free book then? The judgment should be what you think then? If you have any addictions, that is considered bad for your health, is this the self-help book for you or what?

Work’s a Bitch and then You Make It Work: 6 Steps to Go From Pissed Off to Powerful

Review by Linda Yau

What a mouthful of a title, readers of this review, and this is a self-help book. So do take a look at this book if this book can answer your current situation. The stimulus package promises plenty of jobs, so do not lose hope if this book is currently not for you at the moment.

Andrea Kay promises in the beginning that this is a book that would help you accept, and perhaps change, minor aspects of your job. Work’s a Bitch is also a workbook, so purchasers of this book can mark it up as they go through it. Within six steps, if you read and take heart of the facts that Kay writes of, you are on your way to taking some control of your work life.

To sum up these steps, and probably whet your appetite for more of this book:

Step 1: Take Your Pick: Disillusionment or Naked Truth
Step 2: Enough Already: Lay Down Your Cell Phones and Blackberries
Step 3: Have a Brush with Greatness (Even if No One Notices)
Step 4: Prepare for Hurricanes, Sinkholes, and Manana
Step 5: Develop a Sixth Sense
Step 6: Go Twist and Shout and Shake Things Up

There anecdotes are in the beginning of every chapter, with statistics, quotes, and writing exercises to round out the rest of the chapter. At the end of the book, there is a list of resources where readers can refer to for more information about topics discussed in the book.

This is definitely a feel good reminder book for those who are currently in an office setting. So don’t despair if you don’t have that job, but if you do then can you survive in an environment to test out theories of this book? Also if you want to read more on the author’s other career publications, check out her web page here.

The Ultimate Guide to Well Being

Review by Linda Yau

On the cover of this book, there is a figure quoted the Wolrd Health Organization of about one million people committing suicide on an annual basis, and then there is this expression of “If people change their perception we can make it zero.”

The Ultimate Guide to Well Being is a self help book for people who think about committing the act of suicide, and this is a book that would advise on not doing that. There are ten chapters in this guide, and each chapter has examples, and testimonies that can inspire the reader. Each chapter also ends with questions for the reader to fill out. These are self-thought questions, and reinforcement for the readers to thinking about what they have in life to make it worth living.

Chipunkapublishing is a publishing company that is based in the United Kingdom, and their motto is to be an authoritative resource or voice of people with mental illness. The authors that the publishing company publish are people with mental illness, and it is commendable that this publishing house exists for a population that is tormented by a silent illness.

As a publishing medium, self-help books are print materials that strive to provide some preventative means, and if any one would read books such as this, then possibly one’s live can be changed.

Review by Linda Yau

The numbers sound kinda scary, but as the introduction states, 70% of Americans live paycheck to paycheck. With the current economy, this is a book to read if there is concern for the necessity to save.

Michael Davidson is a successful business executive who questions about his financial choices, so with the assistance of his seventy year old Aunt Katherine, he and his wife will go on a journey to develop a sound mind and attitude for learning financial security. Sounds corny right? This is the purpose of The Elephant in the Room, a self-help financial book under the guise of a fiction novel.

There are nine chapters in this book. At the conclusion of each chapter, there is a small recap for the financial/life advice that is learned by the protagonist. This is a book to read if you take it with a grain of salt. There are sound tips to be reminded of, learn or remember. Such as having the right attitude, having stated goals, and an emphasis on values with discipline.

I was highly amused by the title, because it serves as a mental reminder – similar to feeling as if there was a bull in the china shop. The reminder is this: with worry and concern for paying bills, an elephant might be a consistent reminder. But as the problem may ease, upon taking the advice of this book, then the elephant may grow smaller, until it disappears.

As I mentioned earlier, this book should be taken with a grain of salt. My worries are became pronounced when I learned that the author is actually a composite of financial advisers, and also when I saw the publisher’s website. Technically this is an organization publishing this book, so there is a push for consulting and hiring financial advisers.